mel559's Blog
mel559's Profile
Share
Bookmark
Get your own free blog
Is It So Wrong??So Lately..I Have Been Thinking A Lot... Well About A Lot Of Things..I Don't If The Decisions I've Made Are The Right 1s.. I've Been Doubting Myself A Lot..
Love :(I feel so lost..It's like being in love made me loose something of myself.. I mean I love Ryan..His Perfect..But,, Sometimes I wish I could just shut it off && not be in love with him.. It would make things way easier on everyone..It would be like old times.. Before I fell in love with him..When he was just my best friend.. But it's not so simple..I can't stop loving him..It doesn't work that way.. Most of all I just want him to be happy..Even if it's not with me.. But my dumb mouth had to tell him how I feel..Now,, It's just all hard, complicated && awkward.. We can't seem to stop fighting..&& giving each other the silent treatment.. Plus me telling him how I feel brought up the past.. This is when falling in love with your best friend bites you in the azz.. Cuz they know everything..The good, The bad && The ugly.. Plus I got so accustom of being so dependent on him.. It's like I need him..His the only one that understands most things about me.. Cuz his the only one I've told..I miss my best friend.. I wish it was how it use to be..When we would hang out, && be carefree.. When telling him all my secrets felt like the right thing.. When hugging him && telling him "I Love you".. Just meant that I loved him as my bestie..Not real Love.. I want him..I need him..I Love him..But,, Most of all I want my best friend back.. Even if it means letting him go && seeing him happy with someone else.. As long as his happy..I will be happy for him.. I just hate that things aren't how they us to be..I want my best friends back.. I just don't know how to fix this.......
Got A Friend Back..A friend that I had not seen for a very long time is back in my life. It is weird seeing him again. When we where little him, my brother and I where inseparable. His mom & my mom are best friends. After high school he got together with this girl and left. I had also moved away from home,,so we had lost touch. Now his back home, he is so different from what I remember. He use to be this punk rock kid with long hair. Now his just so grown up looking. All his gorgeous hair is long gone, and his dressing style is also different. He has a son now which he take cares of by himself. His ex girlfriend became a hardcore drug addict. So he has raised his son on his own. It so weird being around him sometimes, he is not the same as he was before. He had to grow up to fast. My heart goes out to him so much and his son. That little boy has never know a mom. I have been baby sitting for him for about a weeks now, and his so adorable. I don't know how his mom cared more about drugs than her own baby. I am trying to help him out as much as possible. I know what it is to come back home and feel like you have no real friends. Lucky for him, his mom is there for him, along with my mom, myself, and my friend Layla. We are always more than willing to help him out & babysit when need be. Overall I am happy he is back in my life. My brother and I like to think it's like old time. To us back in those days he was another brother. I still like to think he is.
Zombie-VampireUugh I don't know what is wrong with me..I have been sleeping way to much.. Then just like that I can't sleep at all..It is beginning to take it's toll on me.. I was seriously out this weekend for more that 24 hrs.. I remember waking up at times looking at the time & just going back to sleep.. My mom && brother coming into the room.. My cell ringing over & over but it felt good just to sleep.. Last night around eight I finally woke up.. Took a shower, ate, answered the extreme amount of txts I had.. Since then nothing,,I cannot go back to sleep.. I feel so sleepy still, but I cannot go to sleep.. I went to class, sunglasses on the whole time.. All I could feel was a faint buzzing in my head..I didn't focus well.. I think I was driving way to slow on my way home.. Just concentrating around the buzzing was hard.. Now here I am..I ate something which made me feel a lot better.. Am just waiting for sleep to finally claim me..
Ramble,,Ramble,,Am Super Wasted.. I Think Being Drunk Inspires Me To Write.. Um Well That && The Smell Of Coffee.. So Me && Ryan Got Drunk Together.. God That Kid Makes Me Laugh Like No One Else Can.. He IS Everything I've Ever Needed & More.. It Looks Like It Might Rain Today..I Hope So.. Rain=Cuddling I Need To Get Some Sleep Soon..I Got Class Early.. I Think Maybe It Wasn't Such A Good Idea Drinking So Much.. Am Making A Big Spaghetti Dinner For My Bro. & His Team This Evening.. My Bro. Runs NORTH CAL On Friday..&&I Hope He Qualifies For State.. I Would Do Anything For My Brother.. He Is The Best..I Love That Kid.. I Think I Am Even More Proud Of Him Then My Mom.. I Hope Ryan Made It Home OK..I Think Am gonna Text Him.. Poor Him He Had To Walk Home..He Was To Drunk To Drive.. && I Am Way More Drunk So I Could Drive Em.. K So His Home OK Thank God For That..
NirvanaKURT COBAIN 1 of the best Artist of all time.
"Fool With Dreams"You're a diamond, how I found you I still don't know. But now I got you and I'll never let you go. If your hearts a pocket looking for some change. My heart makes lots of sense Just stay quiet, Breathe deep, Breathe out, Breathe slow. Don't say a word. Let our eyes speak and they will tell you... I'm a fool with dreams, and not a lot of things. I swear that I will be all you need. Don't give up on me. Give me one more day. Don't give this all away. We'll be fine, you'll see. Just don't give up on me. I'd be lying if I said that I'm not terrified. How the hell can I do as they say, and take this all in stride? Does this come with an instruction book? If so I need to have a look. Just stay quiet, Breathe deep, Breathe out, Breathe slow. Don't say a word. Let our eyes speak and they will tell you... I'm a fool with dreams, and not a lot of things. I swear that I will be all you need. Don't give up on me. Give me one more day. Don't give this all away. We'll be fine, you'll see. Just don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. I know you're scared inside, but baby so am I. It gets so hard to hide. I'm not going no where. I'm not going no where. I'm a fool with dreams, and not a lot of things. I swear that I will be all you need. Don't give up on me. Give me one more day. Don't give this all away. We'll be fine, you'll see. You'll see, You'll see... I'm a fool with dreams, and not a lot of things. I swear that I will be all you need. Don't give up on me. Give me one more day. Don't give this all away. We'll be fine, you'll see. Just don't give up on me. Don't give up. By: Framing Hanley
BeautyQuoTe: "There is an inner beauty about a woman who believes in herself, who knows she is capable of anything that she puts her mind to. There is a beauty in the strength and determination of a woman who follows her own path, who isn't thrown off by obstacles along the way. There is a beauty about a woman whose confidence comes from experiences; who knows she can fall, pick herself up, and move on." ..I Just Think This Quote Is Beautiful && So True..
One Tree Hill ONE TREE HILL quote: You ever look a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background?. It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other peoples life have we been in. Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died. Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone elses life, and not even know it. - Lucas Scott (Chad Michael Murray)
I Like To Stay Up All Night Just So I Can Have More Time To Live.Most Nights I Don't Sleep.. I Just Spend The Night Thinking Of All The Memories Of Past Days.. I'm Also Afraid Of The Dark You See.. It's Not That I Need A Night Light Or Any Such Thing.. The Night To Me Is More Comforting When I'm Awake.. I Think Clearer In Those Sleepless Nights.. It Is More Of Being Scared Of The Unknown.. Those Shadows You Can Not See Lurking Around In The Dark.. After A Sleepless Night I Go To Sleep As The Sun Rises.. I Sleep Comfortably && With More Peace Than Most Days.. It Is Hard For Me To Sleep Normal Hours Anyways.. I Also Believe In Living Every Minute Of Every Hour Of Each Day,, TO THE FULLEST.. I Have Spend Apart Of My Life In A Trap Of My Own Making.. So Never Again Will I Live By Someone Else's Rules But My Own.. I Go To Sleep When I Want, && If I Need It.. I Take Everything Serious So I Am Never Late Anywhere.. One Should Always Party Hard, && Laugh Even Harder.. I Get Depressed Easily But I Always Jump Back Up With A Smile.. I Am Responsible 100% The Right Level Of Work And Play,, Is What I Try To Live By..
I Don't Understand Why.I Even Worry Or Get Myself Worked Up Over Things I Know Really Won't Matter.. I've Let Certain Things Bug Me So Much Lately.. I Just Don't Care Anymore.. I Give Up && Things Can Be The Way They Are.. && I Will Just Have To See What Happens.. Dare To Stand Where I Stood && Where I Will Stand!You Can Waste Your Lives Drawing Lines..Or You Can Live Your Life Crossing Them.. I Choose To Cross Them.. Anyone Can Give Up,,It's The Easiest Thing In The World To Do.. But To Hold It Together,,Is True Strength.. Uuugh..Pist..Just Because I Don't Have Them Out For The World To See All The Time Doesn't Mean I Don't Have Them.
SOMETIMES U HAVE TO LET GO..Just 2 See If There Was Anything Worth Holding On 2 In The 1st Place..So i'm Letteing Go..
I Think There Is No Point Holding On 2 Something That Was Never Anything In The 1st Place..
Heartkiller..
Didn't Think I'd Like This Song But The More I Lisen To It The More I Like It..
Paint all your sorrows for me to sing
"There Is But One Choice..Kill Them All."
Spartacus Blood & Sand Finale This Friday..
So SAD But Exciting @ Da Same Time..
It Is Gonna Be So Fuck*n Awsome..
The Secret Of Unconditional Love:
It Is In The Giving That You Make The Person Realize..
Pain..
So I got my wisdom teeth removed today..
All four of them..
God I am in so much pain..
My cheeks are hella puffy..
They look funny..
Aah this just gave me a new reason to hate the dentist..
I Wish I Didn't Feel Like I Had Something To Hold On To..
I Wish I Could Just Move Away && Start Over..Cali Is Fine && All, But There's Too Much That Reminds Me Of Things That I Try Not To Remember..I Wish I Had The Strength To Forget My Feelings && Learn To Not Care..It Must Be Nice To Not Care..Because Then There's Nothing To Hope For..&& Everything Is What It Is..There's No Feeling Like A Dumb Girl..
The Guilts No Good
Framing Hanley: Hear Me Now "Acoustic"
1-20 of 49 Blogs « prev 123next »
Previous Posts  Is It So Wrong??, posted April 8th, 2011, 2 comments Love :(, posted March 15th, 2011 Got A Friend Back.., posted December 1st, 2010 Zombie-Vampire, posted November 16th, 2010 Ramble,,Ramble,,, posted November 4th, 2010 Nirvana, posted August 24th, 2010 "Fool With Dreams", posted July 16th, 2010 Beauty, posted July 13th, 2010 One Tree Hill, posted July 13th, 2010 I Like To Stay Up All Night Just So I Can Have More Time To Live., posted July 12th, 2010, 2 comments I Don't Understand Why., posted May 16th, 2010, 1 comment Dare To Stand Where I Stood && Where I Will Stand!, posted April 27th, 2010, 1 comment Uuugh..Pist.., posted April 19th, 2010 SOMETIMES U HAVE TO LET GO.., posted April 16th, 2010, 3 comments Heartkiller.., posted April 15th, 2010 "There Is But One Choice..Kill Them All.", posted April 13th, 2010 The Secret Of Unconditional Love:, posted April 10th, 2010 Pain.., posted March 25th, 2010, 2 comments I Wish I Didn't Feel Like I Had Something To Hold On To.., posted March 22nd, 2010 The Guilts No Good, posted March 20th, 2010 && So It Starts.., posted March 20th, 2010, 1 comment Can U Keep A secret??, posted February 11th, 2010 One Hand In My Pocket, posted February 8th, 2010 That 70's Show Vs Grease, posted February 8th, 2010 MY FEELINGS, posted February 8th, 2010, 2 comments U R WRONG, posted February 5th, 2010 There's Nothing More To You, posted January 19th, 2010 Teacup Humas, posted December 7th, 2009 Hear Me Now, posted November 3rd, 2009 Taste Like Heaven, posted November 1st, 2009 Isn't This How You'd Like Me??, posted September 23rd, 2009, 1 comment Craziness In My Mind, posted September 16th, 2009 A Little Quote, posted August 18th, 2009 Pin *****, posted August 17th, 2009 No1 Can Tell Us Where Wrong, posted August 3rd, 2009 These Words, posted July 29th, 2009 I Admit..Am Scared.., posted July 28th, 2009, 1 comment Childhood Sounds, posted July 27th, 2009, 1 comment ..She Wakes Up In Lust.., posted July 19th, 2009, 4 comments Outside, posted July 9th, 2009, 1 comment Decode, posted July 9th, 2009 Combo Of Two Of My Fav. Songs, posted July 9th, 2009 Liar..Liar..Liar.., posted July 9th, 2009 Sad Ending, posted July 6th, 2009 Worst Reason To Freak Out, posted July 5th, 2009, 3 comments Queens & Harlots, posted July 3rd, 2009 Around The Circle We Go, posted July 3rd, 2009 Better Than Lil Wayne, posted July 2nd, 2009 Soooo Angry, posted June 16th, 2009 Memories Of A Not So Far Away Past, posted May 28th, 2009Blogroll Here are some friends' blogs...
Help
 Embed Photos
Embed Videos
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
1493 views | 
Permalink
Flag
Anonymous & Free
to join millions in the world's largest community of life experiences
Explore first-person stories about any experience, including your own! Connect anonymously with people who understand.
More Stories
|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||
Be YOURSELF
Be a part of the biggest social experience on the web. Where who you are is more important than who you know. Share what matters the most and find others who just "get it."
Join now and get started in seconds, or learn more about Experience Project
What's Special About This Week?
This week is National Take Back Your Time Week!
This week you're encouraged to work on time management and prioritization skills.
Some related groups:
I Waste Way Too Much Time On the Internet, I Spend a Lot of Time By Myself, I Have Time Management Issues
Of course, we love to hear Your Story, whatever it happens to be. You can be yourself here!
Questions For You
|
|||||||||||||||
